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Common Concerns/Fears About Attending
Your
First PFLAG Support Meeting
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Almost everyone dreads attending that first support meeting. Those
of us who have attended them for awhile can now look back and tell our
funny stories of the crazy thoughts we had prior to attending our first
PFLAG meeting and how wonderful it actually turned out to be. But,
we know we can’t convince you of that now…no one could have convinced us
either before we went the first time. However, what we can do is
address a few of the most common fears associated with attending your first
PFLAG support meeting.
Fear #1: What if I see someone I know there?!?
First, you won’t. You have a better chance of winning one of
those record-breaking multi-state lottery jackpots. There are 4+
million people in the Phoenix metropolitan area. Our attendance at
meetings can range anywhere from 4 people (at one of our smaller locations,
during those dreaded summer monsoon storms) to about 50 people at our central
Phoenix meeting. 50 people out of 4+ million. You calculate
the odds. It just isn’t going to happen.
And, if it did? (Hey, maybe you’re a past lottery winner…)
No sweat. Guess why they are there? Yep, exact same reason
you are there! Trust us, after you’ve begun to deal with your issues,
you’ll wish you had someone close to you to talk to about this. Eventually,
over time, you’ll most likely become comfortable enough where you can confide
in others that you know. But, you aren’t going to find those people
already sitting waiting for you at your first meeting. You aren’t
going to know anyone at a PFLAG meeting unless you bring someone with you.
Fear #2: What will those people be like? Will I see any freaks
or weirdos?Well, how weird are you?
Exactly. We’re ordinary mothers and fathers, seniors and young adults.
You won’t see drag queens or people dressed in leather (those are stereotypes,
and you’ll learn that most stereotypes are either completely untrue or
that they apply only to a very small number of individuals, as with any
group). You might see a man who has some effeminate characteristics,
but that man might be a straight father (yes, you can be straight and have
effeminate characteristics). The same holds true for a woman with
masculine characteristics. Regardless, you will see plenty of other
"normal" individuals who could easily be your next door neighbor, your
best friend or one of your family members.
Fear #3: Okay, I want to attend a meeting. But what do I do when
I walk in that door?!?This one is easy! You’ll be greeted by one of our facilitators
inside the door. We’ll have you put your name (first name only) on
a name tag (to help us address each other during the sharing groups), and
we’ll ask you if you’d like to be included on our confidential mailing
list for our monthly newsletter. We’ll also offer you several of
our informational pamphlets. Then, if you want, you can grab any
available seat and wait for the meeting to begin. You can also browse
our "lending" library of helpful books and videotapes to see if anything
interests you. At our central Phoenix location, we also have refreshments
available which you may indulge. The rest will simply take care of
itself!
So, relax…come see us…and bring a friend! We’re a friendly bunch!
Still nervous? Then you've got to read our "love letter"
from Shelly! Click here
to read what she wrote about her first experience attending a PFLAG support
meeting. You'll feel the same as her . . . everybody does!
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