Innate sexual attraction. One’s core sense of the gender(s) of people toward whom one feels romantically and sexually attracted. The inclination or capacity to develop intimate emotional and sexual relationships with people of the same gender, a different gender or more than one gender. Doesn’t presume sexual experience/activity (i.e., sexual minority people are as capable as heterosexual people of choosing to abstain). To some degree, the qualities one finds attractive may be learned, probably in the first few years of life.  There is growing evidence that people may be, however, biologically (hormonally, genetically) predisposed to be more attracted to one gender or another or to people of more than one gender. In all instances, use this term instead of sexual preference or other misleading terminology.  See lifestyle.  [Note:  Some people object to the term "orientation" and instead prefer the term "Sexual Identity."]

Avoid.  See sexual orientation.  [Note:  Outdated term that fell out of favor once the scientific, medical and psychological communities began to acknowledge that one's Sexual Orientation/Sexual Identity was not a "preference", which implies a conscious choice available to the GLBT individual.]

One’s understanding or feeling about whether one is emotionally or spiritually male or female or both or neither.  A person may be congruent (i.e., his/her gender identity and physical gender are consistent) or transsexual (born biologically one gender; but emotionally and spiritually, the other) or not quite either one.

One’s gender expression and one’s beliefs and feelings about the appropriate and/or comfortable expression of one’s gender. To some degree, gender role is clearly learned (socially constructed and culture-specific). To some degree, people are probably biologically predisposed to be more “feminine” or “masculine.”

Heterosexual; non-gay. Term preferred by some straight people as less clinical and formal than heterosexual, but some dislike it because it gets confused with not using drugs or with being a rigid person. Some GLBT people object to it as implying that they must be, in contrast, bent.

Heterosexual

Clinical synonym for straight.  When discussing with school-aged children, the following references may be more appropriate:

• K-3: “A man who loves a woman or a woman who loves a man.”

• 4-8: “A man who gets strong crushes on women more often than on men, or who falls in love with a woman. Or a woman who falls in love with a man.”

• 9-12: “A person who is romantically and sexually most attracted to people of the other gender.”

Gay

An adjective that has largely replaced “homosexual” in referring to men who are sexually and affectionally attracted to other men. Avoid using as a singular noun. For women, “lesbian” is preferred. To include both, use “gay men and lesbians.” In headlines where space is an issue, “gays” is acceptable to describe both.  When discussing with school-aged children, the following references may be more appropriate:

• K-3:  “A man who loves another man or a woman who loves another woman.”

• 4-8:  “A man who gets strong crushes on other guys more often than on women, or who falls in love with a man. Or a woman who falls in love with another woman (but she might prefer to call herself lesbian than gay).”

• 9-12:  “A person who is romantically and sexually most attracted to people of his or her own gender. The term refers to people of any gender, but when possible, it’s more respectful to use the terms gay and lesbian.”

Avoid this term; it is clinical, distancing and archaic. Sometimes appropriate in referring to behavior (although same-sex is the preferred adj.). When referring to people, as opposed to behavior, homosexual is considered derogatory and the terms gay and lesbian are preferred.  Use only if “heterosexual” would be used in parallel constructions, such as in medical contexts. For other usages, see gay and lesbian.

Lesbian

Preferred term, both as a noun and as an adjective, for women who are sexually and affectionally attracted to other women. Some women prefer to be called “gay” rather than “lesbian”.  Other lesbians feel invisible when the term gay is used to refer to men and women.  When possible, ask the subject what term she prefers.

Bisexual

As a noun, an individual who may be attracted to either sex. As an adjective, of or relating to sexual and affectional attraction to either sex. Does not presume non-monogamy (or, for that matter, any sexual activity).  Some people self-identify as bi rather than bisexual.  [Note:  While a bisexual individual can be attracted to individuals of either sex, it does not imply that they can be/will be attracted to more than one individual at a time.]

Transgender 

(adj) An umbrella term that can include preoperative, postoperative or nonoperative transsexuals, female and male cross-dressers, drag queens or kings, female or male impersonators and intersex individuals. If an individual prefers to be called transsexual, drag queen or king, intersex, etc., use that term.  [Note:  All terms included in this definition are defined in a separate "Advanced Terms Related to Gender Identity and/or Gender Expression" section below.]

Another definition:  An umbrella term increasingly preferred by people whose appearance, personal characteristics or behaviors are gender role nonconforming … individuals who might otherwise call themselves transsexual, cross-dressing or gender-bending. Also preferred by some people who are emotionally neither sex or both sexes or whose gender role expression is significantly different from what society expects of people of their sex or changes from time to time. Transgender people may be heterosexual or gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Some people self-identify as trans rather than transgender.

One more definition:  This term is a used to signify someone who transgresses the man/woman dichotomy and rejects the binary gender system. Transgender in this way can mean cross dressers, butch/fem, transsexual, third genders, androgynes, queergenders, genderbenders, genderblenders, and whatever other terms folks prefer.

Note:  The image on the right is an image we found on the Internet.  While it helps to depict many of the terms/conditions that may fall under the general "transgender" umbrella term, we recognize that some people might disagree with some of the terms included here.  That debate, if any, is for another time and place.  We're just trying to get across that the term "transgender" can and does encompass many different people and conditions.

Found along with this image:  According to the Trans Activist Network:

In simplest form, "trans" refers to transgender, transsexual,  intersex, cross-dressing, drag, butch, femme and all other forms of gender variance. Trans individuals seek gender rights allowing them to present their gender identity as best suits them. "Trans" is not limited to individuals who change their "sex" or their bodies, but includes everyone who desires a greater freedom of gender expression.

GLBTQ

Acronym for “gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and 'questioning'.”  Sometimes used, for example, to identify the young people who attend a school-based support group. Some groups also welcome heterosexual friends and allies and/or students with GLBT family members.  [Note:  Sometimes denoted as "GLBT", as used throughout our website, or LGBT.  Other variations might include GLBTQQAI which includes gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, "questioning", queer, allied, and intersex people.]

Pejorative term for gay. Now being reclaimed by some young gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgender people and those whose identities are fluid, especially White young people living on the Coasts, as a self-affirming umbrella term, but it is still a slur in many contexts and is generally prohibited in schools with anti-harassment policies.  To understand more about how this term has evolved, read this article.

A member of a historically more powerful identity group who stands up against bigotry. For example, a man who confronts his friend about harassing women, a Christian who helps paint over a swastika, or a heterosexual person who objects to an anti-gay joke.

Short for “coming out of the closet.”  The process of first recognizing and acknowledging non-heterosexual orientation or trans-gender identity to oneself and then sharing it with others. Developmentally, many sexual minority youth will initially erect emotional barriers with acquaintances, friends and family by pretending (actively or through silence) to be heterosexual and congruent. Coming out means dropping the secrecy and pretense and becoming more emotionally integrated. This usually occurs in stages and is a non-linear, lifelong process.  See closeted and outing.

(from “out of the closet”) Publicly revealing the sexual orientation or gender identity of an individual who has chosen to keep that information private. Also a verb: The magazine outed the senator in a front-page story. See coming out and closeted.

As a modifier, “openly” is usually not relevant; its use should be restricted to instances in which the public awareness of an individual’s sexual orientation is germane. Examples: Harvey Milk was the first openly gay San Francisco supervisor. “Ellen” was the first sitcom to feature an openly lesbian lead character. “Openly” is preferred over “avowed,” “admitted,” “confessed” or “practicing.”

Gay, lesbian and bisexual people date, court, and sometimes make homes together. They use various terms to describe their commitments (e.g., boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse, lover, husband, wife). Ask the individual what term he or she prefers, if possible. If not, partner is generally acceptable.

Unmarried partners who live together. Domestic partners may be of opposite sexes or the same sex. They may register in some counties, municipalities and states and receive some of the same benefits accorded married couples. The term is typically used in connection with legal and insurance matters. See gay/lesbian relationships.

A gay, lesbian, bisexual or heterosexual person’s sexual partner. “Partner” is generally acceptable. See gay/lesbian relationships.  [Note:  "Lover" is a term used by many same-sex couples in longer-term relationships, (or individuals from such past relationships) as that term was the accepted term in the '60s, '70s and '80s.  Today, the term "Partner" is being used by more and more same-sex couples as some are not comfortable using the term "Lover", as they feel it implies a sex-only relationship as opposed to a full loving, emotionally bonding and sexual relationship.  When in doubt, simply ask the couple in question what term they prefer.]

An inaccurate term sometimes used to describe the lives of gays, lesbians and bisexuals. Implies that the homes, careers, and relationships of all sexual minorities are identical. There is a GLBT culture, with its own performing arts and body of literature.  There is a GLBT community, with gay- and lesbian-identified businesses, publications and holidays. But the degree to which people who identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender take part in this culture and community varies from not-at-all to almost exclusively.  There is no gay lifestyle, just as there is no straight lifestyle.

A formal, marriage-like gathering that recognizes the declaration of members of the same sex to each other. Same-sex marriages are not legally recognized in the United States. (In April 2001, The Netherlands became the first nation to offer legal marriage to same-sex couples who are citizens or legal residents.)

The state of Vermont began this formal recognition of lesbian and gay relationships in July 2000. A civil union provides same-sex couples some rights available to married couples in areas such as state taxes, medical decisions and estate planning.

Originally coined to mean, in classic psychological terms, irrational fear of homosexuality. Now refers usually to bias against or dislike of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people or of stereotypically gay/lesbian behavior, or discomfort with one’s own same-sex attractions, or of being perceived as gay or lesbian. A less inflammatory term is anti-gay (as in anti-gay harassment).

Presumption that heterosexuality is universal and/or superior to homosexuality. Also: prejudice, bias or discrimination based on such presumptions.

Short for gay/lesbian pride, this term is commonly used to indicate the celebrations commemorating the Stonewall Inn riots June 28, 1969. Pride events typically take place in June. See Stonewall.  [Note:  In Phoenix, the annual outdoor Pride parade and festival have been moved to April due to the excessive summer heat here.]

Politically charged term used by opponents of civil rights for gay people. Avoid. “Gay civil rights,” “equal rights” or “gay rights” are alternatives.

(adj.) The movement, mostly rooted in conservative religions, that aims to change the sexual attraction of individuals from same-sex to opposite-sex.

Grown-ups who are raising a child together, who may or may not be biologically related to the child. Sometimes refers to the partner of a biological parent. Sometimes refers to both (or all) parents, step-parents, partners and other guardians.

The crime committed by certain professionals who are required by law to contact child protective services and/or law enforcement when they know or suspect that a child or teen has been neglected or physically or sexually assaulted, when they fail to do so.

Refers to the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution. This clause states that all citizens are due equal protection under the law and cannot be discriminated against through selective enforcement. This means that schools are responsible for equally protecting all students. Sexual harassment policies, for instance, must be applied consistently, regardless of a student’s (or an employee’s) gender or race or religion or sexual orientation or gender expression.

The use of terms such as family or parents/guardians, instead of mother-and-father in a letter about an upcoming open-house. Or of gender-neutral terms (e.g., partner, instead of boyfriend or girlfriend) in a lesson on communication.  Terms that allow every child and family to feel they belong at school, including those who are gay or lesbian (as well as children who live with a single parent or grandparents, etc.).

Gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people.

(adj) An umbrella term that can include preoperative, postoperative or nonoperative transsexuals, female and male cross-dressers, drag queens or kings, female or male impersonators and intersex individuals. If an individual prefers to be called transsexual, drag queen or king, intersex, etc., use that term.

Another definition:  An umbrella term increasingly preferred by people whose appearance, personal characteristics or behaviors are gender role nonconforming … individuals who might otherwise call themselves transsexual, cross-dressing or gender-bending. Also preferred by some people who are emotionally neither sex or both sexes or whose gender role expression is significantly different from what society expects of people of their sex or changes from time to time. Transgender people may be heterosexual or gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Some people self-identify as trans rather than transgender.

One more definition:  This term is a used to signify someone who transgresses the man/woman dichotomy and rejects the binary gender system. Transgender in this way can mean cross dressers, butch/fem, transsexual, third genders, androgynes, queergenders, genderbenders, genderblenders, and whatever other terms folks prefer.

Note:  The image on the right is an image we found on the Internet.  While it helps to depict many of the terms/conditions that may fall under the general "transgender" umbrella term, we recognize that some people might disagree with some of the terms included here.  That debate, if any, is for another time and place.  We're just trying to get across that the term "transgender" can and does encompass many different people and conditions.

Found along with this image:  According to the Trans Activist Network:

In simplest form, "trans" refers to transgender, transsexual,  intersex, cross-dressing, drag, butch, femme and all other forms of gender variance. Trans individuals seek gender rights allowing them to present their gender identity as best suits them. "Trans" is not limited to individuals who change their "sex" or their bodies, but includes everyone who desires a greater freedom of gender expression.

One’s understanding or feeling about whether one is emotionally or spiritually male or female or both or neither.  A person may be congruent (i.e., his/her gender identity and physical gender are consistent) or transsexual (born biologically one gender; but emotionally and spiritually, the other) or not quite either one.

One’s gender expression and one’s beliefs and feelings about the appropriate and/or comfortable expression of one’s gender. To some degree, gender role is clearly learned (socially constructed and culture-specific). To some degree, people are probably biologically predisposed to be more “feminine” or “masculine.”

Omnisexual or Pansexual

One whose romantic, emotional, or sexual attractions are geared towards others regardless of sex and/or gender expression.

(noun) An individual who identifies himself or herself as a member of the opposite sex and who acquires the physical characteristics of the opposite sex. Individual can be of any sexual orientation. To determine accurate use of names or personal pronouns, use the name and sex of the individual at the time of the action.

Another Definition:  A person (pre, post or non-operative) who is biologically one sex (at birth), but emotionally and spiritually another.  Female-to-male transsexual (FTM) people are born with female bodies, but identify as male. Male-to-female transsexual (MTF) people are born with male bodies, but identify as female.

Acronym for “female to male.” A transgender person who, at birth or by determination of parents or doctors, has a biological identity of female but a gender identity of male. Those who have undergone surgery are sometimes described as “post-op FTMs” (for post-operative). See gender identity and intersex.

Acronym for “male to female.” A transgender person who, at birth or by determination of parents or doctors, has a biological identity of male but a gender identity of female. Those who have undergone surgery are sometimes described as “post-op MTFs” (for post-operative). See gender identity and intersex.

This refers to the level and/or stage of physical transition an FtM or MtF transexual might go through. A pre-op person has not yet have had any surgeries to alter their body to fit their gender. A pre-op may also be not yet be on hormone therapy to change their secondary sex characteristics. A post-op person has had operations. A non-op person does not intend to surgically alter their body, but rather live in the body they have as the gender they are.

The process by which one alters one’s sex. This may include surgery, hormone therapy and changes of legal identity.

Shorthand for Sex Reassignment Surgery. I.e. gives a biological male a vagina and removes the breasts of a biological female. For FtMs, the breast-removal surgery is referred to as "top surgery" and the lower area procedure is referred to as "bottom surgery."

The complex distilled into the simplistic. Basically, for those who are anatomically considered "male" this means having a penis at birth, and for those who are anatomically considered "female" this means ovaries, womb, vagina, etc. at birth. Also refers to chromosomes. The terms are used to refer to what gender roles people were assigned at birth.

An adjective to describe a person (referred to archaically as a hermaphrodite) who was born with an anomaly of the reproductive system – with genitals or chromosomes that were not clearly male or female.  At least 1 in 2,000 children is born with genitals that make it difficult for even an expert to determine their sex.  Some doctors consider such anomalies as hypospadias (in which the urethral opening is somewhere other than the tip of the penis) which occur in 1 of every 200 baby boys to be intersexed conditions.  For more on the intersex community, visit the Intersex Society of North American website.

Having a gender and a gender identity that match. Non-transsexual and post-operative transsexual people are congruent.

Someone who associates and is comfortable with the gender they were assigned at birth.

There’s a growing number of people who reject the either/or binary gender system (i.e., "male" or "female") and prefer to consider themselves the "and" of the gender world. You could almost say, historically speaking, that berdaches were third gendered.

Someone who identifies as male and/or female, but in a fluid state where they go between those genders depending on the day or context (e.g.,"today I feel more male").

Attire of the opposite sex.

Entertainers who dress and act in styles typically associated with the opposite sex (drag queen for men, drag king for women). Not synonymous with transgender or cross-dressing.

Preferred term for person who wears clothing most often associated with members of the opposite sex. Not necessarily connected to sexual orientation.

Avoid.  Coined in the 19th century.  A person - not necessarily gay - who dresses in clothing most often associated with another gender. The increasingly preferred term is a person who cross-dresses.

A direct translation of the Ojibwe term, Niizh manidoowag, "two-spirited" or "two-spirit" is usually used to indicate a person whose body simultaneously houses a masculine spirit and a feminine spirit. The term can also be used more abstractly, to indicate presence of two contrasting human spirits (such as Warrior and Clan Mother) or two contrasting animal spirits (which, depending on the culture, might be Eagle and Coyote); however, these uses, while descriptive of some aboriginal cultural practices and beliefs, depart somewhat from the 1990 purposes of promoting the term.

According to Brian Joseph Gilly, male berdachism "was a fundamental institution among most tribal peoples." Will Roscoe writes that male and female berdaches have been "documented in over 130 tribes, in every region of North America, among every type of native culture."

The Stonewall Inn tavern in New York City’s Greenwich Village was the site of several nights of raucous protests after a police raid on June 28, 1969. Although not the nation’s first gay civil rights demonstration, Stonewall is now regarded as the birth of the modern gay civil rights movement.

Now a gay pride symbol, it was the symbol gay men were required to wear in Nazi concentration camps during World War II. Lesbians sometimes also use a black triangle.

A flag of six equal horizontal stripes (red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and violet) signifying the diversity of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender communities.  (Note:  The original rainbow flag had eight colored stripes, but it was later shortened to just six stripes.)

Shorthand for “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, Don’t Pursue,” the military policy on gay men, lesbians and bisexuals. Under the policy, instituted in 1993, the military is not to ask service members about their sexual orientation, service members are not to tell others about their orientation, and the military is not to pursue rumors about members’ sexual orientation. The shorthand is acceptable in headlines, but in text the full phrase adds important balance.

Originally a pejorative term for a gay male, it is now being reclaimed by some gay men. Caution: still extremely offensive when used as an epithet.  It is still a slur in many contexts and is generally prohibited in schools with anti-harassment policies.

Pejorative term for homosexual. Avoid.

Originally a pejorative term for an effeminate gay man. Still considered offensive when used as an epithet.

Pejorative term for a lesbian. Some young women self-identify as dykes, but it is still a slur in many contexts and is generally prohibited in schools with anti-harassment policies.

Pejorative term for a gay man or a man who doesn’t fit masculine gender role stereotypes. As unacceptable at school as racial or religious slurs.

The virus that causes AIDS. “HIV virus” is redundant. “HIV-positive” means being infected with HIV but not necessarily having AIDS. AIDS doctors and researchers are using the term “HIV disease” more because there are other types of acquired immune deficiencies caused by toxins and rare but deadly diseases that are unrelated to what we now call AIDS. See AIDS.

A medical condition that compromises the human immune system, leaving the body defenseless against opportunistic infections. Some medical treatments can slow the rate at which the immune system is weakened. Do not use the term “full-blown AIDS.” Individuals may be HIV-positive but not have AIDS. Avoid “AIDS sufferer” and “AIDS victim.” Use “people with AIDS” or, if the context is medical, “AIDS patients.” See HIV.