What is Domestic Violence? *

Domestic Violence is:

• A pattern of many behaviors directed at achieving and maintaining power and control over an intimate partner.  Such behaviors include:

  • physical violence
  • emotional abuse
  • isolation of the victim
  • economic abuse
  • intimidation
  • coercion

  • threats

• NOT caused by the victim's behavior -- batterers avoid taking responsibility for their behavior.

• A widespread problem that occurs among all ages, genders, races, educational backgrounds, socioeconomic groups, and sexual orientations.

• The single largest cause of injury to women between the ages of 15 and 44 in the United States -- more than muggings, car accidents and rapes combined.  (Note:  Men are victims of domestic abuse also!)

Domestic Violence Statistics: *

• 85% of domestic violence victims are women; 15% are men. 

• Each year, between 2 million and 4 million women are battered, and 2,000 will die of their injuries.

• In the United States, 76% of women who experience rape or physical assault are attacked by an intimate partner.

• 40% of men committed violence against their wives after separation.  16% of the time, it was during exchanges of the children.

• 50% of men who abuse women also abuse children.

• The second highest cause of death for pregnant women is murder by an intimate partner.

• Homicide is the No. 1 cause of death for women on the job, and 20% were murdered by their partners while at work.

• In Arizona, one in four women will experience domestic violence some time during her life.

• In Arizona in 2004, police statewide received 100,000 domestic violence calls.

• In Arizona, an average of 100 individuals die each year as a result of a domestic violence-related homicide.

• In Arizona, 70% of all known domestic violence-related deaths involve the use of a firearm.

Are You In An Abusive Relationship? *

It can be hard to admit that you're in an abusive relationship and to find a way out of it.  If the person you love or live with does any of these things to you, it's time to get help, according to the National Women's Health Information Center (Note:  These questions apply equally to men who may be suffering abuse also).

Does he/she:

_____ Monitor what you're doing all the time?
_____ Criticize you for little things?
_____ Constantly accuse you of being unfaithful?
_____ Prevent or discourage you from seeing friends or family or going to work or school?
_____ Get angry when drinking alcohol or using drugs?
_____ Control how you spend your money?
_____ Control your use of needed medicines?
_____ Humiliate you in front of others?
_____ Destroy your property or things that you care about?
_____ Threaten to hurt you, the children or pets, or cause hurt by hitting, beating, pushing, shoving, punching, slapping,
           kicking or biting?
_____ Use or threaten to use a weapon against you?
_____ Force you to have sex against your will?
_____ Blame you for his/her violent behavior?

If you answered "yes" to any of the above questions, please contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).

Ten Myths About Abusers *
Find out what's fact and what's fiction when it comes to abusers

By Pat Whitney, Arizona Republic

Most people think they can identify a likely abuser out of a crowd.  "Not so," says Leah Meyers, Domestic Violence Service director for the Arizona Coalition Against Domestic Violence (AzCADV).  "Sometimes the nicest, most charming people may only show their abusive sides in intimate relationships."

At Chrysalis in east Phoenix, Jackie Anderson directs a domestic abuse offender treatment program that attempts to give batterers tools to stop patterns of violence.  "PAC-PEACE works on preventing abusinve conduct by cultivating empathy," Anderson says.  "We try to et the offenders to look through the victim's eyes."

Sharon Rauch, the program's facilitator, adds that "all behaviors can be changed.  We try to help offenders identify what feelings and behaviors led to the volence and focus on choices.  If se can't engage them, they can't change."

The Top 10 Myths about the Identity of Perpetrators

 

1.	MYTH:  Battering is caused by drugs and alcohol. FACT:  They may be a factor, but they're not a cause or condition for becoming an abuser.
2.	MYTH:  Only men are domestic abuse offenders. FACT:  The fact is, we have women's groups, too -- not as often, but when they do commit an act of domestic violence, it is usually by running over their partners with a car or using a lethal weapon -- not physical harm.
3.	MYTH:  Domestic abuse perpetrators are only poor and uneducated, and from minority racial groups. FACT:  Perpetrators cross all socioeconomic barriers.
4.	MYTH:  Batterers cannot control their anger. FACT:  Actually, they are very much in control.  More than anger, the rage is about control, verbal and psychological abuse and isolation.  It is definitely pre-meditated.  If it were all about anger, they would be directing it toward everyone -- road rage, for example.  But domestic violence is directed to someone to whom they are emotionally attached.
5.	MYTH:  Domestic violence offenders often stop on their own. FACT:  They don't stop until they get caught, seeking treatment only then.  Self-referrals are very rare.
6.	MYTH:  Victims often provoke their abusers into battering them. FACT:  People choose to become batterers.  Saying it's the victim's fault is a way of not taking responsibility for their actions.
7.	MYTH:  Domestic violence is only physical. FACT:  Domestic violence can be physical, sexual, psychological, verbal, financial or spiritual.
8.	MYTH:  Batterers won't hurt their partners if they are pregnant or have already left the relationship. FACT:  The most dangerous time and when a life is most at risk is when the partner is pregnant or leaving the relatioinship.
9.	MYTH:  Batterers don't love their partners. FACT:  They usually love their partners very much and are emotionally dependent on them, despite their actions.
10.	MYTH:  Batterers who damage their own property aren't committing domestic violence. FACT:  Criminal violence is a form of threatening and intimidating behavior and is considered domestic violence.

Getting Help *

* Source:  "The Faces of Domestic Violence" supplement to the Arizona Republic, April 17, 2005.